It’s funny. People always make a comment about how I must have help, or how tired I must be or how hard it is. Honestly? Not so much. I hadn’t really realized how different parenting styles are between moms of multiples (MoMs) and those who have one kid at a time. Even if they have 20. For us, cry it out was a necessity, not a choice. Bottle propping? Totally acceptable. Rinsing a bottle and reusing instead of sanitizing it and having one for each feed? Convenient. Not bothering with infant carseats because at 20 pounds each (plus children) I might as well be carrying a grown adult in my arms.
I hadn’t really thought about how easy we have it. People comment about how we are finally getting sleep? Um, we’ve been sleeping through the night since 4 months old (minus the rare sick nights or teething, etc). They make a comment about how hard it is to go grocery shopping? Yeah, we do it anyways. Because you just have to. And why not? The car ride there and back they’re all buckled in and can’t go anywhere!
That whole “I am going to cry if I get put down so you must hold me all the time” mentality of singleton babies? Yeah, we don’t have any of that. They did tummy time enjoyably since they came home. And being put down is a way of life. No, we’re not mean parents. And we’re not cold. And we’re not lacking for love in this house. It’s just a different type! They’re self-sufficient, they entertain each other, and big brother is here to help when I need a third hand!
All of those little rules and guidelines go out the window – it’s about survival. The TV is typically on (not that they are watching or engaged by it, but we definitely don’t keep it off just to keep them from it). We don’t spoon feed in this house – everything is finger foods and baby fed. Sometimes, we wear pajamas for two days straight because they’re clean and mommy has enough laundry to do as it is. And sometimes the babies get a bite of cookie or other things that are frowned upon. Normally because big brother gave it to them.
What does this mean? Absolutely nothing. Other than mommy can sit at the computer and get work done while the babies play because that’s what they know, and when babies cry in this house we wait a few seconds to see how bad it is and if it really requires mommy’s help or if it’s just an angry cry because brother took our toy. We learn to share, cooperate, play, self-soothe, self-feed, self-assist, fight back, stand up for ourselves, and many other traits that most kids don’t learn until they’re in their 20s (at the earliest). Why? Because that’s just how we roll in this house.
Now that I’ve filled you all in on my little secret, though, I’ll go back to pretending I’m super mom when asked, insisting it’s the coffee that has gotten me through the year, and yawning excessively when in conversation just to make myself look even more amazing. Because, well, why not? I guess I should go, there’s a baby on the couch and my superwoman cape needs adjusting!
3 thoughts on “Three easier than one?”
i still think your amazing!!!
Love it! That was a funny post. I can relate. I think raising multiples requires you to be a bit more laid back as parents because you do not have time or enough hands to be otherwise.
People always comment in public about how well be haved my trio is. And I think its less anything that we did & more stuff we didn’t. We didn’t “get” to coddle them as babies. “Baby” them ever per say. And I think they learned great self soothing mechanisms quick. They STTN early too & still sleep great through almost any noise. I agree… Multiples (maybe not everywhere, but in this house too) are held to different standards, for the sanity & survival of everyone! And I kinda like it!!